RapperMania: Legendary Finishing Moves From Your Favorite Rapper
Hey I have a secret. Wrestling is fake. Another secret. Rap isn't much realer.
Now that that is out we can look at Wale using a few tweets to locate, interrogate and assault a wrestling fan and see how he's been conditioned to keep it as real as a wrestler.
Rappers have been beefing for years over reasons as logical as Kane fighting his "older brother" because he used to pick on him(I see you Cormega).
So now #CULTUREDAPPROVED presents "Legendary Finish Moves For Your Favorite Rapper":
Jay Z/ "The Summer Jam Screen"
"Don't make me do it to you dunny, cause I over do it/So you won't confuse it with just rap music."-"Takeover"
Jay Z has never been merely a rapper. Jay Z's immense popularity and wealth are products of him 1. perpetuating the image of the representative of a 2. maintaining such an image by So when he disses you, he is trying to eviscerate you in the same way Vince McMahon takes care of disgruntled employees that have transcended to becoming household names, eviscerate them in the most public manner.
His most recent example, "We Made It" verse and its [Drake disses]. Jay took Drake simply saying "It’s like Hov can’t drop bars these days without at least four art references” and that “the whole rap/art world thing is getting kind of corny.”
Nas /"The Ether"
"This that Ether, that shit that makes your soul burn slow"
Since their epic 2001 battle, Nas has never mentioned "Takeover" in any of his song lyrics. Jay Z on the other hand:
"Maybe my homie Nas, but I got stronger after Ether"- "Brooklyn High"(2006)
"thought we would Takeover, I caught her bumping Ether"- "Venus vs. Mars" (2009)
Nas was "f*cked over, left for dead, forgotten" and then released the "Ether" and stunned the rap world at large. That Ether burns as long as that Stone Cold Stunner.
Drake/"The OVO Shuffle"
"All hits, no mrs, that's for the married folk."
When Drake said if an MC dissed him they’d “never hear a reply for it”, he probably meant his return shot would have a silencer. Drake has never mentioned a rapper's name in a song, however he has successfully had a rivalry with Kanye West, Jay Z, Pusha T and Common in the past 3 years.
The John Cena of rap, Drake is a polarizing artist based on his appearance of being a manufactured image juxtaposed by his undeniable knack for mixing emotions with gruff bravado in a deceptively efficient manner.
On the surface is a rhyme such as "All hits, no mrs, that's for the married folk." regular line but when you think about it..shit is a hard bar.
50 Cent/"The Robbery"
I heard Irv tried to shine Shyne, but I ain't got no love for them
Tell him 50 said he's soft, he won't shoot up the club again.
Rumor has it that 50 Cent was shot in May 2000 over the details he revealed in his song “Ghetto Qu’ran.” That’s 50’s style. Unexpectedly rob his opponent of their momentum and private life details and use it against them. The only man to receive a Jay Z Summer Jam Screen and not only get up but get better:
“50 came through/like hurricanes do/I thought I killed his ass at Summer Jam too.”- Jay Z in 2009 (10 years after giving 50 the Summer Jam Screen)
Brock Lesnar could easily lift and drop almost any wrestler in under three seconds but he chooses to hold them up and spin them around before dropping them.
Eminem/"The Nail In The Coffin"
If there was any rapper equivalent to The Incredible Hulk, it would be a 44 year old (weight) suburban dad who hasn’t taken a drug (let alone superhuman levels of radiation) in over 4 years.
Ja Rule pondered “Your mom is a dope fiend and Kim is a known slut/So I wonder what Halie going to be when she grows up?”
The Eminem proceeded to:
1. Have his daughter appear on a song dissing Ja Rule asking her to brinig him his Oscar to “Shove it up Ja Rule’s a*s”
2. Makes "Bump Heads".
3. Apparently prevented Ja Rule and Murda Inc from attending the MTV VMA’s in 2003 by merely showing up.
He uses his strength to press on his opponent's momentum before stretching them beyond their limits until they either submit or are destroyed.